When it comes to quitting one’s job, advice is plentiful. Raise your hand if you have come across a condescending article saying you are weak if you don’t quit your job right away and pursue everlasting happiness *cue in the unicorns*.
Those articles seem to ignore the fact that not everyone has parents with garages one can start a business out of because mot**rf**kers, we are the parents with garages! Midlifers pay bills, feed dependents, and keep aging parents provided for. With such responsibility on our shoulders, jumping ship needs to be done with care and planning.
Now, I won’t bore you with advice on how to start your exit plan. You are probably well into it by now – getting retrained, building up your business slowly on the side, making the necessary risk calculations. As I mentioned in my introductory blog, I am here to commiserate. So allow me to share a few things that I am doing to keep myself distracted and a little less miserable:
(1) I’m giving ‘just enough’ at work. I’m not saying I’m underperforming, but I stopped trying to impress and started scaling back. This gives me time and energy for the things that matter to me now – like job hunting and this blog ;-).
(2) I am exercising more. This is pretty difficult considering I’m not athletic at all. The upside: happy hormones are keeping my depression in check. Downside: my God, does my lower back hurt.
(3) I told my spouse about my discontent. I think it’s important that he knows he’s not the source of my mood swings and general anxiety. We now spend time together planning what to do when we win the lottery, find new jobs, or build our business. And yes, we are trying all three!
(4) Every time I go through a phase of discontent, I pick up a new hobby. Back in 2007, I learned how to cook. Now, I’m starting this blog. I’m also going through a number of business ideas and trying to figure out which ones will work.
(5) I have a playlist. Intentional or not, we have playlists for the different phases in our lives. I made one to keep me going during this transition. I imagine myself as an elite athlete training for a competition except that I’m training for a new phase in life 🙂 Can you hear the ‘Rocky’ soundtrack playing in your head?
What about you? How are you coping?
Well, whatever you are doing, enjoy your distractions, focus on your exit plan, and endure.
Endure, my friend, we’ve come this far. The finish line might be closer than we think.
Midlife Space 
Nicely expressed. My subconscious sorted my exit plan for me- it is errant, and simply kicks me if I don’t follow its no-nonsense approach to things. Last year, it simply said ‘enough’ to my corporate life and gave me a full-on breakdown; depression, panic attacks, anxiety, the lot. Since then, I’ve been a full time dad to my 3rd child (1) and it’s been tense but fab. A breakdown also categorically showed me my own mortality, and I’m more humble (I could be an arrogant twat sometimes). The way I visualised it is that I felt the edge of my own universe for the first time.
Keep writing!
Chris
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Thanks. I felt I was close to a breakdown a few weeks ago so I started writing. Last time I felt this way was when my mom died and I simply decided to shut everyone out – for 2.5 months. Obligations don’t allow me to quit just yet but I hope to do so in the near future. Seems you are doing better now. I’m glad for you.
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Writing is definitely a good way to deal with things. Sorry to hear you felt so bad. I guess my point was that my obligations didn’t allow me to quit either (I am not wealthy, and have all the usual commitments) but my subconscious didn’t care about that and decided to force me out anyway. It’s a relief actually when your fears come true, and as long as you don’t actually die there are many many ways and means of adapting.
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